How would I start?

I cannot even begin to understand the change that is taking place in me. a couple weeks ago I felt God calling me to let go of secular music for awhile. now this doesnt mean I listen to Christian music, most of it i cant stand, I just dont listen to much music. Until my friend Matt started using me as a "music helper". I guess thats what i'll call it. he has an i-pod type device but no computer to music on it with, so he buys CD's, i put them on my comp and the on his "Zen"( the i-pod type thing). The first CD he asked me to do this with was Hillsong, United which just so happens to be the CD my brother bought my mom to play in the mornings, so subsequently I heard it all the time over the summer. I started listening to it and wasnt altogether that excited until I realiezed what it does to me. I was really lonlely the other night( my last xana entry) and the next morning i still felt the same way. I pulled out my ipod and went straight to Hillsong by default because thats all ive been listening to ( this an Sufjan stevens of course). as I started to l listen to the words I was totally uplifted, because it wasnt about me! it wasnt about how i felt or what i was going through, it got the focus off of me and where it should be : on Christ. I couldnt believe how much my other music had been effecting me. I am not saying that i wont ever listen to anything else again. I am just giving this up for a season, maybe a long season, i dont know, but what i know for now is that I am to weak to listen to it, I get to focused on me, who i am and what im going through when i listen to it.

Last night me, manda, Chris and Mike were in the "Rustang"( Chris' car that we have adventures in ) on our way to Hanalei to watch the sun set . ( its on the north shore of the island so you can just see it setting over the ocean). Mike chared with us some of the things that he had been discovering in the bible and what he was trying to figure out. we all discussed and it kept comming back to how big God is. later when the four of us were laying on asfalt on the side of the road looking up at the billions of stars, we prayed. not just prayed, but worshiped. we couldnt help but stand in awe of how big God is. we cryed out to him, reached up to him and we loved and comforted by him. later sleeping on the beach i was reminded of the last weekend I spent in Murietta when we all drove to the beach at 2 in the morning. I had fallen asleep praying and i woke up with God. looking out over the ocean was almost more than I could handle. The sky was still very dark and my eyes were blurry from sleeping, but I woke up knowing that i would have to do something, and In that point i was so determined to do it and follow God. I heard him whisper " I love you" as the waves crashed and I had peace.

I am sharing all of this with the hopes of encouraging some of you with the things that have encouraged me.